Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Like Water for Chocolate - not a review

This is a little post that has been burning a hole in my "Unpublished" file. Please note that you have to have watched the movie to know what I'm talking about.

Caution: the following text may contain spoilers.

I happened to catch the classic movie Like Water for Chocolate a few weeks ago on SBS.

I love the book, by Laura Esquivel, and the recipes are simply amazing, but also frighteningly exotic and intense, never mind that they were able to make them without electricity or a visit to the supermarket.

Girl and dog, are you familiar with the foods in the book, have you perhaps even made them?

Naturally I had many erudite thoughts about arthouse cinema while watching the movie.

Thoughts like, Hmm, I see Brazilian waxing was not big in Gertrudis's day.

Lumi Cavazos, who plays Tita, reminds me a lot of Mary McDonell. They have such ladylike faces. Earth mother faces. I don't know how else to describe them.

Marco Leonardi, it helped that I hated you the first moment I laid eyes on you, because you certainly play that cowardly idiot Pedro to perfection.

If MFC had been listening (and he wasn't, because he was playing noisy Warcraft DOTA games in his room), he would have heard me yell things like:

"Pedro! You CHICKENSHIT!" (This one was used, as they say, repeatedly, and often.)

"Hah! Serves you right! Yeah, how do you like them bananas, Pedro?"

"Oh, for the love of ...! Your first night of guilt-free sex and you kick the bucket after the act. Damn you, Pedro!"

Mind you, Dr Brown hasn't aged too well at all. Is there NO MAN alive who is worthy of Tita? I hope she ditches that zero, Pedro, in heaven and gets herself a hero.

Like one of the Spartans from 300.

Oh, and also, is it just me, or do all Spanish-speaking movies feel like porn? I mean that in a good way. Everything tries to seduce you, even the scenes with no sex in them.


Juliness said...

I keep telling myself that I must read the book, having been entranced by Johnny Depp's character in the modern version of LWFC.

I was giggling in agreement with your assessment that most Spanish speaking movies seem sexy. (And French and Italian too.) They don't call 'em 'Romance Languages' for nothing.

PS I'd love to have a recipe for the spicy chocolate sauce.

girlanddog said...

You're too funny, Angie! :) Yes, I have made some of the recipes in the book, and yes, they're a nightmare to accomplish. Women back then didn't have jobs, cell phones, or Target. They could focus on making a dish that took three days to prepare. I'm lucky if I have three minutes to figure out what to make for dinner.

We Latinos are extremely hot-blooded. Ever see a Mexican soap opera? It's all about the cleavage and the sexy, hunky men with dark, brooding mustaches. Anywhere you go in Mexico you'll see PDA's. I always feel like shouting: Get a room, will ya?

Julie - Google "mole" recipes, that's the mexican name for spicy chocolate sauce.

an9ie said...

Juliness, EVERYTHING sounds nicer in French, Italian, or Spanish. I even find my voice sounds nicer when I speak French. Sigh.

I love Johnny Depp, and would leap at the chance to meet him, but I think I have to beat MFC to the the punch first.

Girl, I think there are Chinese recipes like that too. Where you could start making dinner in the afternoon, starting with painstakingly removing every single root off a bean sprout.

I look forward to visiting Mexico one day :)