Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Harsh But Fair?

The title for this post was brought to you courtesy of my housemate K. (Except for the question mark. That's all mine, baby.)

According to an article in today's news*, Kirsten Dunst enjoys smoking marijuana, and says that it can be inspirational. Apparently, "if everyone smoked weed, the world would be a better place."

This is just the kind of broad fantasy generalisation I love. Ooh, ooh! Let me try some!

If fairies were real, everyone would ride unicorns!

If I had a million dollars, I would pay Nathan Fillion to be my fake-husband for three months!

OK, maybe that last one wasn't so broad or general, but I do think about it lots. Mmm . . .

I suppose if everyone was too stoned to commit any crimes, that wouldn't be such a bad thing. You could throw off muggers just by pointing behind them and going, "Look! A colourful swirly thing!"and then run away.

I just haven't been very impressed with its effects on people I know, and I don't think it's very responsible of Dunst to say something like that to the media.

One of my best friends from high school nearly threw herself off a second-storey balcony after trying pot for the first time, because she thought "they" were chasing her.

Another friend, who was a frequent user, told me she would become incredibly paranoid and go, "Why is everyone staring at me? Stop them staring at me! The dog is staring at me!" after a few cookies.

And then of course there was that time Useless saw a couple of possums and ran away thinking they were enormous rats.

When I talk to people at parties who nurse their joint like a candy cane and become excrutiatingly slow and incoherent, I feel like my head is going to explode. And then they fall asleep, which is just rude, I tells ya.

Dunst also said that Carl Sagan was "the biggest pot smoker in the world and he was a genius." Well, dammit. My opinion of Carl Sagan just lessened considerably. And to think I got all excited last week when I saw him on X-Files!

Luckily, I don't need pot to be creative, just a strong streak of passive-aggression, a soul filled with black inky darkness**, a memory that holds grudges dating back to the 80's, and music overflowing with pain and thrashing guitars.

Tell you what though, Kirsten, I'll consider using pot to "inspire" me, if you consider wearing a bra whenever you go out in public.

* Smoke more pot, says Kirsten Dunst. Article from BANG Showbiz.
** As opposed to the white, powdery kind.