Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Peeves

I had an encounter (and I use that term very loosely) with one of my pet peeves yesterday. One of the things I hate, because it makes me soar to the heights of hopeful, innocent joy, only to come crashing down into bleak misery*, is when people take the last biscuit, but leave the empty packet behind, to ambush unsuspecting Angies. Deceit! Heinous deceit!

This then reminded me of some other pet peeves, because I am nothing if not anal, in my resentments. Do note that I am actually not referring to my current housemates here, because they are lovely and responsible people and a delight to live with (thank goodness). I'm actually referring to situations in previous houses I've lived in, or houses that I've stayed in during my travels, or past workplaces.

Such as:

  • Finding out that whoever used the milk last, ALMOST used it all up, but left a teaspoonfull's worth at the bottom of the container, so that they didn't have to be responsible for throwing it out**.
  • People who do not check the toilet to make sure they have flushed it properly, leaving a mellow, or worse, floaty surprise for the next person who uses it. Argh! My eyes! My eyes! (This check would also cut down instances where people dribble various bodily fluids onto the toilet seats and don't wipe them off.)
  • And while we're talking about toilets, this next bit is a bit too queasy for the boys, so I shall white it out (highlight with the mouse to read, IF YOU DARE):
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Women who throw their used sanitary napkin or tampon directly into the sanitary waste bin without wrapping it, so that it smears, or even worse, sticks to the metal tray. Unwary Angie lifts tray to dispose of her own unmentionable ladies item and . . . ARRRGH!

Wrap the damn things up first, people!
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Man, the whole toilet thing is making me wonder if I should just drive straight home when I need to pee. Even if I'm in a restaurant or at an art exhibition.

  • Finding the sink full of dirty dishes, even though there is an empty dishwasher an arm's length away.
  • Using the dryer when we live in a state with very little rainfall, and it is always sunny outside and there is a clothesline. Perth does not need dryers, seriously.
  • People who try and cram as much as they can into the kitchen bin, even when the bag is overflowing, because they can't be bothered tying up the bag and carrying it out to the council bin, which is like, 10 metres away.
  • Not recycling.
I sense a pattern here. It's about people taking less and less responsibility for their waste. With indoor plumbing and electricity and gadgets and high density housing and council waste disposal, we're removed from the problem, and so we don't care. And this is why the planet is going to shit.

How would these people have fared in Ye Olden Days when you had to dig a hole for your own poop, feed your kitchen waste to the pigs or chickens, and cultivate a lime pit for bodies?

Hmmm . . . Angie imagines scene that looks suspiciously like it was stolen from The Crucible but sssh! I won't tell if you won't!

Proctor Jim: "The lime pit overfloweth with potato peelings! Who was too idle to transmogrify their unused kitchen fare? Now we have nowhere to put our dead! I blame THEE, Biddy Buntface!"

Biddy Buntface: "I was under a spell! The devil made me do it!"

Goodwife Angie: "I saw her, Proctor Jim! The hellion danced with a cohort of imps as she mouthed incantations and sprinkled potato peelings into the pit! And she ate all the chocolate biscuits too!" (Buries face in apron and sobs.) "Oh, those goodly chocolate biscuits, now condemned to the devil's abode!"

Proctor Jim: "Thou art a witch! And shall be burned, then hanged, then burned again!"

Goodwife Angie: (cackles into her apron) "That'll learn her to eat all the chocolate biscuits."


* I once got a B instead of an A in English for using language that was "too flowery". Can you believe it?
** Or rinsing and recycling it, as the case may be. This is what I do***.
*** I'm a good girl!

3 comments:

ジェネヴィーヴ said...

How would these people have fared in Ye Olden Days when you had to dig a hole for your own poop, feed your kitchen waste to the pigs or chickens, and cultivate a lime pit for bodies?
Haha, that made me laugh pretty loud.

Good post! I agree on all points. And the napkin/ tampon thing... UGH. Some people are just SO gross! : /

Blandwagon said...

Chocolate biscuits are the Devil's teatime treats! 'Tis a good thing that they are gone, to tempt us no more.

an9ie said...

Jyeneuiiuu (apologies if I got this wrong, I've never seen the "u" katakana with the whiskers so I'm not sure how to write it):
Thanks for the visit! Yes, people are gross, and these are just the free-range ones. I can tell you about much grosser stuff from my boarding school days!

blandwagon:
I know Tim Tams are on sale at Coles for $1.27 a packet at the moment! Aieee!!