Thursday, September 29, 2005

Black Eyed Peas

The Black Eyed Peas were on at the Burswood Dome last night. They came on after John Legend at about 8.45 and kept going for two hours. Damn good value. Fergie's face looked very scary on the big screen but she has ripped abs and can do one-handed cartwheels so all is forgiven. Very good rack also. In fact all the Peas are pretty good breakdancers. Who would have thought it? Acoustics were not fantastic but you could still recognise the songs. Kate was antsy all week that they'd do old stuff like "Joints and Jam" - and they did.

On a side note, while that song was being played, suspicious smelling smoke was wafted off the stage. Eau de grass? Would they have money to burn a bale of the real thing for each show? I don't know.

I was in the front general admission area by myself. (After dinner I had to separate from the girls because they bought their tickets an hour after I got mine, and there were no standing tickets left in my area. In a hour.) The vibe was pretty good so I didn't mind.

Side-note: after last night, as Gwen is my witness I am never settling for anything less than front standing room at a rock concert. Being any further away is just not worth it.

I started off 50 metres away from the stage but started doing a little shuffling and dodging and some Jedi mind-tricking and finally ended up about 20 metres from the front centre. Not too shabby. There were some short girls there that I felt sorry for because there was no way they could have seen the stage.

A group of feral skanks on my right tried to push their way to the front but someone's boyfriend gave them the hard word. Hee. They also tried to pick a fight with some private school girls but that fizzled out. I was a little disappointed. I mean, da-mn, my first time in the pit AND a girlfight. Ah, the stories I could have told...

It's funny how mobile phones have replaced lighters when the ballads come on. Much prettier and without the stigma of lung cancer. How I wish my phone took proper digital photos instead of LSD-trip shots.

I also like Taboo's style, even if he does look like a character from Planet of the Apes. Will.I.Am came on and did some improv rap which was pretty good. He also did a quick cover of Milkshake and Drop It Like It's Hot. Now that's something everyone could sing along to.

The bits I enjoyed the most were:

- when "My Humps" came on. Yes, go on, cast the first stone. You love it too. Liar.
- the Peas breakdancing.
- watching feral skank girls try to get right up the front and failing, then trying to get closer to the middle but being pushed back by little schoolgirls. One of them tried to get past me but I just engaged my abs. (One day, when RPM has worked its magic, perhaps others can see them too.)

I do like that Humps song. Sigh. Although I mock them, I'm afraid I do have a little chigga in me.

RPM

Ah, a new exercise addiction. Cycling to music. Brilliant!

I started RPM it to improve my kendo performance. Witness, however, that I have been to nil kendo practices and 3 RPM classes this week. Those endorphins are damn addictive. I finish one in the morning and by lunchtime I'm already thinking about my next RPM hit.

Smart Car and mummy's boy underpants

If you Google images and type in "smart car", a car with an interesting light blue pattern will appear halfway down the page. (I asked Damon if he'd seen any smart cars [as in the ones made by Daimler-Chrysler] and he found some on Google images.)

So anyway that pattern reminds me of the men's underpants you see in Target. When I see them I usually think "What the hell kind of grown man would buy those?" It's like their mothers have always bought their underwear and they finally move out of home at 40 and they have no idea what to get and keep buying ye old faithfuls.

Well, stop it. I swear those things are on the top 10 "Is your date a loser?" list that sends women running away. Right up there with g-string swimwear and wearing white singlets under see-through shirts. Gentlemen, the only female equivalent that immediately springs to mind is, well, nothing springs to mind. I suppose because as long as there's a naked chick in front of them guys don't care if she's wearing some dead raccoons and a hat made of earwax. Ditto for Speedos. No patterns. Just plain, and in any colour as long as it's black*.

White underwear, unless you're Marky Mark Wahlberg also makes women queasy. Please, unless you're an immaculate gay man who knows about bleach - no white.

Well, that's my rant for the day done.

*5th Oct 2005 - Hmm, in retrospect, that's probably a little harsh. I would like to rephrase that as "any solid dark colour". There, there, you can stop crying now... :)

Friday, September 09, 2005

"10 secrets for success and inner peace" by Wayne Dyer

1. Have a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing.

2. Don't die with your music still within you.

3. You can't give away what you don't have.

4. Embrace silence.

5. Give up your personal history.

6. You can't solve a problem with the same mind that created it.

7. There are no justified resentments.

8. Treat yourself as if you already are what you'd like to be.

9. Treasure your divinity.

10. Wisdom is avoiding all thoughts that weaken you.